Be positive

I have a new boss, and she has moved into what used to be my ‘meditation room’ and now I’m feeling a little bit lost. More lost than I should rightly feel. Maybe this meditation malarkey has been having more effect than I give it credit for. I meditated at home yesterday instead, but the juju was all wrong. I could use the first aid room but you never know when somebody might come bursting in with a violent head wound and need the space to bleed everywhere, so I’m reluctant to take up that option.

Feeling defeated about the fundraising ball again. What else is new.

I am still sans 7 challenges and I am wondering what to do about this. I have faith that I may still receive a couple more but others I am not so sure about. And some people I wonder why I continue putting energy into them. I actually changed my mind at the last minute about one of the recipients, adding somebody who should have been on the list from the beginning and for some stupid reason wasn’t there, and taking off somebody who I realised was a complete waste of my time, as usual. I get tired thinking about such things very quickly. To be very curt about it, I did a ‘cull’ of such people in my life a few years ago, and I haven’t regretted it. Sometimes you’ve got to know when to let go, you know? But then I think: there is reward in savouring friendships. Most people mean well. It’s about finding a balance.

Originally when people asked what would happen if I found myself in this situation (not having all challenges returned), I was steadfast: their loss, and more time for me to concentrate on the ones that did arrive. I’m wondering now if there is room for 7 more of them, and there probably isn’t. But that in itself was part of the challenge, right?

Here’s what I’m going to do. Any outstanding postcards on 22nd October 2010 – that’s 3 months after the project started – will have their Challenger Rights forfeited. Maybe I’ll then choose to challenge myself in place of the missing ones. I already have some ideas. They won’t be too difficult or time consuming, more like new year’s resolutions (and probably taken with as much salt, so there is also no pressure to finish them in the same way as the others). Like, I’ve been thinking for a long time, I should really give blood. My blood type is B+. Be positive! How can I not share blood that life affirming!

Anyway, I’ll deal with that in November. I have a lot to do before then.

PS. We finally have a government again! About fricking time! Lead well, Julia... lead well.