As you can see, I fell off the band wagon a little bit. Sorry about that.
A few weeks ago, I read this blog post. The timing was impeccable. My feelings at the time were reflected in Jan's realisation: goals should not be chores. And for her to write that post at almost the exact point I felt it, with her doing a similar 30 before 30 and a birthday only four days after mine... it was too poignant.
I don't feel disappointed or regretful about the last few months. The only thing I really feel sad about is letting other people down. People were excited about the concept, I put a lot of faith in my 29 and most of them returned that faith. I gave almost every task I was given a good shot, although full completion of tasks is a little more sketchy. It felt so invigorating to make and re-make those connections with people, to feel a rush of expectation, to be inspired, to be challenged. But somewhere between July 22nd 2010 and now, stuff changed. Personally, I feel that some of that stuff might not have changed were it not for this project, even indirectly, and it is for the better. It has been not only a good lesson in self-evaluation, but a valuable lesson in what we can and can't control. And some things we can't control include idiot bosses, school holidays, cars that choose to break down every second day, the weather, people who won't answer emails, the fact there are only twenty-four hours in a day and seven days in a week, and also that no matter what I say "yes" to or how I choose to spike my hair , I am not Danny Wallace. Fortunately.
Most of all, I am still bristling with the joy of turning 30 (although it still feels very distant, I'm sure that will change in a few days), and with the accomplishments of the past year.
Oh, and I guess I should probably tell you about this:
WINTER BALL! Please help us raise some money for spina bifida services.
On my 29th birthday, Ben brought all of the postcards to the restaurant, and after dinner he relished in reading them out to me, one by one. Katie's postcard, instructing me to "hold a fundraising ball for the charity of your choice for 500 people", was the very first one. Can you imagine that? Eating an amazing meal and getting ready to hear 29(ish) pieces of your destiny, and that's the FIRST ONE. I nearly forewent desert. Nearly.
For some reason, it was very important that this - in many people's eyes the most difficult of the tasks - not go undone. I realise that we will probably not get 500 people there, but it otherwise fits the brief. All of the acts are going to be wearing formal gear, which is going to be so much rad, and we're encouraging the punters to as well. And with any luck, we'll make some extra cash for Northcott Disability Services. So if you're in the Sydney area, please come - Gallery Bar @ Oxford Art Factory, this Friday. Don't buy me a drink, just chuck a fiver into the donation tin.
"I'm not thirty yet," she grinned.
