One quarter down...

Captain’s Blog, belatedly summarising on the first quarter of absurdity.

#1 – The Fundraising Ball. Ugh. I have not thought any more about this and will really have to think of a plan of attack soon if I’m to pull it together in any way that will be even mildly successful.
#2 – The Other Fundraiser. As previously mentioned, 3 fundraising events is a bit much, so unfortunately for Tracey, this one has been merged.
#3 – Laughing Strangers. 12 weeks, 2 laughs. It is a pitiful tally. I keep having lots of ideas on how to make this work, but chickening out of them. Time to grow some metaphorical balls.
#4 – i. Mediation. My consistency leaves a little to be desired, but I am definitely meditating a lot.
ii. Good Deed a Week. Did anybody else notice that I totally disregarded this challenge? My bad. This was before I realised I wasn’t going to get a full 29 challenges. Maybe I should pick this up.
iii. Song Per Month. I’ve written… 2.5 of them. Only that pesky .5 to go, and I could probably knock it on the head if I wasn’t so pedantic about the whole thing.
iv. 26km Coast Track. I think we’re going to do this in late January.
#5 – Songs About Challenges. I’ve written… 2.5 of them. But the lyrics are good.
#6 – Bathurst. I contacted that guy, but never heard back. I should try harder.
#7 – Gospel. Finally, a challenge I can claim to have actually advanced on! I’ve been accepted as a member of the choir and are attending rehearsals every week.
#8 – Children’s Hospital. Before I delve too far into this one I need to learn some children’s songs.
#9 – Harbour Walks. I’m really lagging on this one. I went to buy ‘sensible walking shoes’ and came back with some Adidas Shelltoes. Hmm.
#10 – Driving. I’ve only had 4 lessons, but we did purchase a car. Unfortunately it doesn’t like us very much and I am scared to get in it, but I’m hoping this will pass.
#11 – Tasmania. All booked in for the first weekend in February… although now I think of it we should maybe book some accommodation.
#12 – Scrapbooking. I pressed some flowers. That’s about all the progress I’ve made on this one this month.
#13 – Cooking. I’ve been dabbling in the kitchen every now and then. Schnitzel is next on my list.
#14 – TV. Why hasn’t anybody called me? Note to self: register for Letters & Numbers.
#15 – Horseriding. This update requires an entirely separate post.
#16 – Sydney to Gong. The ride is only 13 days away. I am freaking out.
#17 – Reunion Dinner. I tracked down the old parish priest and I must get back in touch and see if we can lock in a date. Wow.
#18 – Breakdancing. Matt & Cassie threatened to change their challenge, but it’s too late now. I will deal with this one next year.
#19 – The Heart Is A Lonely Hunter. Indeed it is. I finished the book, and went through the emotional ringer getting there too. What a story.
#20 – Yeats. No progress.
#21 – Youtube. Same old, same old.
#22 – Busking. I have got a couple of songs under my belt now, but not yet a full repertoire.
#23 – Cliff. Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you about this one. Apparently I have to jump off a cliff. A specific one, into water. You’re not supposed to, but people do it all the time, so they say. If your friend told you to go jump off a cliff, would you do it? I guess I have to…
#24 - #29 – This also requires a separate post: Friend Fail.

The first time I did a monthly summary, it made me feel a lot better about my overall progression with the whole thing, and got me gee’d up and excited about it… I must admit, it’s not working quite so well any more… bring on November…?

Bike maths

It took me 35 minutes to ride into work this morning – new personal best. Self esteem win. I did however have another high flying business jerk dangerously cut me off on Abercrombie St at whom I yelled the C word very loudly, so I’m also glad I didn’t get arrested. Ben’s got some new App on his phone that tracks his journeys and gives him a reading of his average speed, distance travelled, etc. It’s pretty cool and significantly cheaper than buying one of those fangled bike computers. Yesterday he did 9.94 kms in 27.14 mins, so that’s looking like just over 4 hours to get down to Wollongong. A worthy target. Me, I guess I’m averaging out at around 40 minutes for 8.2kms, so that brings me in at the slightly less impressive time of 7.3 hours. Ben leaves at 6.30am so as expected will probably be frolicking in the ocean or gorging on French toast well before 11am. I leave at 8am so I’ll be lucky to arrive before 4pm. Yikes. Carly has tried to alleviate my concerns by reminding me that she doesn’t even own a bike yet... but I'm not sure if it's working.

It’s the 22nd, and I need to record my 2 songs. Jacob’s is entitled “Tiny Mantis” and is about distracting myself from bigger issues by watching the wildlife directly outside my window. Bart’s is entitled “The Ballad of the Substandard Cyclist” and is rather self-explanatory. To be honest, neither of them are 100% complete, but I was kind of hoping that if I pointed behind you and yelled “hey look at that really interesting thing over there!” nobody will notice.

Oh yeah, and we’re playing at Marrickville Festival on Sunday for a blazing hot 20 minutes. Come and be amazed! And also, make yourself sick on gozleme. But mostly be amazed.

Meditation update

I have been practising meditation in a range of formats and with fluctuating levels of success. Here is a pretty exhaustive list of stuff I’ve tried:

- Sitting cross legged
- Sitting against a wall
- Kneeling
- Lying down
- In the bath
- On the train
- Outdoors
- Vibrational meditation (ie. Chanting and mantras)
- Breath watching
- With music
- Without music
- With audio instruction (these are really helpful)
- With binaural sound recordings (this seems to work best for me)
- Focussing on one sound
- “Empty mind” meditation (I am terrible at this)
- “Mindful” meditation (trying to become super aware of everything)
- Eyes closed
- Staring at a candle
- Staring into middle distance
- Wii Fit Zazen (My highest score is something like 96 seconds… but frankly I’m not sure it counts as meditation)

My dedication to this task has been abysmal of late. I have started setting an alarm so that I am forced to go at a certain time and find somewhere to meditate, and I think it is important to do it at work whenever I can. It is entirely necessary. I spend a lot of time internally talking myself out of quitting. My boss calls it “highly strung”.

Lift me up like a doooo-oooove

It has been officially three weeks since I became a probationary member of the Glory Bound Groove Train, and all is well. Sonya and I (another girl who joined on the same day) have been told that paperwork pending, we’re in. I guess now is the time I should come clean about the 29 Before 30 thing, just in case this only lasts until the end of the year. I hope not, though. I’ve had a couple of rough Tuesdays, and there is a strange calm in singing about the Good Lord fixing things (regardless of your religious inclinations) and losing your voice within the community of warm tenors, beefy basses and twangy sopranos. Maybe it sounds cliché, but it does something uplifting for the spirit.

It's a very laid back affair, but at the same time it feels satisfying to be getting into the nuts and bolts a little bit - phrasing, how to breathe, dynamics.

And we have a ‘gig’ coming up! Early December. It’s in a pub in Glebe so that is excellently familiar, and a lovely way to lazy summer Sunday afternoon - just add Pimms. (Everyone seemed to think it was quaint when I produced a pen and diary to note the date. Regardless of being one of the youngest members of the group I think I’m probably the only one without an iPhone, and I’m totally ok with that).

**hrumph**

Crunk, our car, has just unburdened us of almost the same amount of money that we paid for him in repairs, so that’s nice. The dangers of being so desperate for a car and wanting to see good in people. Hey Ramzi, you’re a jerk! Consequently, I’m a jerk too, particularly in my workplace where I’m starting to think knowing what you’re doing isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.

I have some kind of eye infection, I think, which has been plaguing me for a couple of days. Relevant? No. Thematic? Yes. I will stop being grumpy soon. Promise.

Overwhelmed

I am now officially too busy to do anything, ever. This is multi-tasking at its most ridiculous level. It's Monday morning and I am no longer in denial about my desire – nay, necessity – for energy drinks. I’m wondering exactly at what point I decided my life wasn’t full enough as it was, who had spiked my drink at that time, and how I should punish them. Unfortunately, the more I think about it, the more acutely aware I am that this was my own preposterous idea.

What Would Danny Wallace Do? Quit his day job? If my day job was writing articles for the paper about how awkward my life is, it probably wouldn’t be this crazy. It would fuel itself. I bought ‘Awkward Situations for Men’ on the weekend as a reward to myself and am hoping it will somehow inspire me… another idea that is slowly dawning on me as not-very-well-thought-out. Also, the 22nd is 4 days away and I still have 2 songs to write. This is a problem because I have choir tomorrow, dinner on Wednesday, and band rehearsal on Thursday, but I’ll figure it out somehow.

I was asked to join Briscoe as a full-time band member, to which I immediately reacted in 2 ways: soul-leaping joy, and brain-constricting tiredness. Dusker have a lot of shows coming up, which means more frequent rehearsals, and doubling that worries me. But, you only get out what you put in, eh? I love that band too much to turn it down. I was thinking about sticking with the gospel choir longer-term but now know that the only sane thing to do would be to drop out once we’ve done a live performance and I can tick the box; free up some time for the next thing. I rode my bike again today but my head and lungs were working against my legs, and it felt like pedalling while being hugged by an octopus. I know I’m in an emotional trough right now and this will pass soon enough, but the fact of the matter is I’m still in a trough, and the pigs are looking in, and it smells a bit like rotting food scraps.

BUT! We booked our flights back to the UK over the weekend (our departure date is July 24th, 2 days after my 30th) AND we bought a car. Damn straight, we are people of action. It’s a 1997 VW Polo and it is Fully Sick, something us middle-class inner-west vegetarians-on-Thursdays bicycle-riding herb-growing white folk are going to have to work on. We’ve already removed the crass medallions from the rear view mirror and the Everlast car seat covers, but it’s the embarrassingly loud modified exhaust muffler that really needs to go. I’ll post a picture of it once I’m a bit more organised.

Our rescheduled horseriding lesson is happening this Saturday, so now we can even drive out to Glenworth Valley instead of catching the stinky old train. Amazing.

We also bought a new Jamie Oliver cookbook, 30 Minute Meals. I really dig the style it has been written (step by step through the whole meal, not just one section of it at a time. So for example it tells you to take care of the potatoes after you’ve done your bit with the meat, and then while the potatoes are doing their thing you go back to turn the meat and then you can start on the salad, or whatever). He’s still Jamie Oliver though so mostly it’s hard for me to get past the fact he’s a bit of a twat, but I have warmed to him somewhat over the years. Still, I resent having to go hunting for fennel seeds. Also, it took me 50 minutes to cook only 2 of the 4 components of his 30 minute meal, but that's probably saying more about me than it is about him. Just as well it tasted good.

Blowholes and buses

I've only had one so far, so I don't have much for a point of comparison, but Wedding Anniversarys seem to be pretty great. Happy 1st year, Ben Husband Pask! We had a little getaway down the south coast where we discovered that the Little Blowhole is more excellent than the Big Blowhole, coastal walking tracks are not greatly signposted, the Vietnamese restaurant is top class, and if you keep your eyes peeled on the ocean for long enough, you might even spot an unexpected and beautiful pod of whales. Good times.

Some interesting outcomes arose from the weekend, one being that Cityrail thoughtfully chose to have track work on the day we travelled down and consequently made our journey 4 hours long rather than 2. We were made to get off the train at Waterfall and take a rail replacement bus to Wollongong. Buses obviously travel less by rail and more by road. The road that is going to become more familiar to us in a few weeks time when we are pedalling feverishly along it (or potentially, when I am dragging my bike along the side of it). Needless to say, it was a little daunting. Even Ben felt a lump in his throat.

Secondly, we are officially tired of public transport. We have done our time with buses and trains, and even hire cars with their stranglehold of garage opening/closing hours, forcing us to drive through the loathsomeness that is East Sydney. The decision was planted and swiftly germinated into a hulking great oak - we're going to purchase a car. True story.