Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Oreos
Swiftly on to less depressing things... We tried the Minute to Win It Oreo challenge, which is to move an Oreo from your forehead to your mouth using only your face muscles. I was quite cocky about this but soon realised it is far more difficult than it looks. I eventually learned to do it, but not before getting a lot of crumbs in eyes and hair and cleavage. They should put a warning on those things.
We interrupt this transmission for a rant
Confession: I'm miserable.
It's a dreary, rainy Tuesday. I did not want to get out of bed, but not in the "I'm cozy and don't want to move" way. More in the "if I drag myself into work today, my soul may just crumble" kind of way. I did it anyway, and trudged through the drizzle in my so-called water-resistant hoodie, clutching at a paper bag with a blueberry muffin in with my left hand, my right sock sliding shamefully and awkwardly into my boot. As usual, one of my team members is not in, leaving me to carry their load as well as my own. It's embarrassing. I think my soul crumbled somewhere around 9.53am.
What I needed this year was a stable, reliable job. I've been in my current place of employment for around 2 years now and you know what? I discovered I was good at it. I was enjoying it. The people are great. I felt confident about everything I was doing. I was relieved to be doing something that didn't absorb my out-of-work hours the way my old music industry ones used to. And now? I can't remember the last time I was so weighed down by this kind of sadness over a job. I hate feeling like this.
I was looking forward to getting a foot up in the company, hopefully making a bit more money (we certainly need it), and still having plenty of time to work on the wonders of self-enlightenment in my 30th year. We're planning a month-long trip back to the UK next year, after it's over, which I am already bristling with excitement about. I need to earn time off for my band, and for mini-trips (such as Kat's Tasmania challenge). I am now used to having a stable 9-5 job, something I'd never really had before. Having taken the "do what you love" route and finding it drains the passion rather than fuels it, I have never taken this situation for granted. I want it to stay the same. The last thing I want right now is a complication. I want to like my job again.
I've still not managed to make anybody laugh, but that's because all I want to do all the time is cry. Fortunately, I have the loveliest husband ever who just happens to work two blocks away, and is kind enough to trek through the rain to bring me Indian food on such occasions. Thank you, B-Dawg.
It's a dreary, rainy Tuesday. I did not want to get out of bed, but not in the "I'm cozy and don't want to move" way. More in the "if I drag myself into work today, my soul may just crumble" kind of way. I did it anyway, and trudged through the drizzle in my so-called water-resistant hoodie, clutching at a paper bag with a blueberry muffin in with my left hand, my right sock sliding shamefully and awkwardly into my boot. As usual, one of my team members is not in, leaving me to carry their load as well as my own. It's embarrassing. I think my soul crumbled somewhere around 9.53am.
What I needed this year was a stable, reliable job. I've been in my current place of employment for around 2 years now and you know what? I discovered I was good at it. I was enjoying it. The people are great. I felt confident about everything I was doing. I was relieved to be doing something that didn't absorb my out-of-work hours the way my old music industry ones used to. And now? I can't remember the last time I was so weighed down by this kind of sadness over a job. I hate feeling like this.
I was looking forward to getting a foot up in the company, hopefully making a bit more money (we certainly need it), and still having plenty of time to work on the wonders of self-enlightenment in my 30th year. We're planning a month-long trip back to the UK next year, after it's over, which I am already bristling with excitement about. I need to earn time off for my band, and for mini-trips (such as Kat's Tasmania challenge). I am now used to having a stable 9-5 job, something I'd never really had before. Having taken the "do what you love" route and finding it drains the passion rather than fuels it, I have never taken this situation for granted. I want it to stay the same. The last thing I want right now is a complication. I want to like my job again.
I've still not managed to make anybody laugh, but that's because all I want to do all the time is cry. Fortunately, I have the loveliest husband ever who just happens to work two blocks away, and is kind enough to trek through the rain to bring me Indian food on such occasions. Thank you, B-Dawg.
Monday, August 9, 2010
I'm a fish, yo!
Carla and Jez and junior (very recently discovered to be pink flavoured) have decided I should learn to cook a meal for each day of the week without using a recipe. Kitchen anxiety is something Carla and I have shared over many years, but I think we’re getting better at it. I like this challenge.
I cooked salmon and fried rice last night, which I kind of already knew how to do, so I’m not sure if that’s cheating. But I didn’t use a recipe, and Ben ate all of it, so it must have been ok. Admittedly I did have to make 2 trips to the shops after realising we didn’t have certain ingredients, and in the end still didn’t have soy sauce, but I couldn’t be bothered going back a third time. So, I can definitely get better at this.
I forgot to take a photo of it, so instead here’s a picture I drew in Paint:
As tasty as it looks!
(ok, picture may not be entirely accurate. Fish was filleted and therefore did not have creepy head still attached and was certainly not speaking. And come to think of it, it was not nearly as phallic as that. Also, bed of rice looked a lot more like rice and less like kitty litter. Anyway.)
Planning to next tackle a vegetarian dish - we practice “Meat is Murder Thursday” (thank you Morrissey for the name) so as to make sure we have at least one meat-free day a week, plus we have loads of vegetarian friends so it would be nice to be able to cook for them too. To counter, there’s a lamb cutlet recipe on Masterchef I’m keen to take on. And if Heath’s challenge pans out, I’ll need to learn how to make lasagne too... but that’s another story for another time.
I cooked salmon and fried rice last night, which I kind of already knew how to do, so I’m not sure if that’s cheating. But I didn’t use a recipe, and Ben ate all of it, so it must have been ok. Admittedly I did have to make 2 trips to the shops after realising we didn’t have certain ingredients, and in the end still didn’t have soy sauce, but I couldn’t be bothered going back a third time. So, I can definitely get better at this.
I forgot to take a photo of it, so instead here’s a picture I drew in Paint:
As tasty as it looks!(ok, picture may not be entirely accurate. Fish was filleted and therefore did not have creepy head still attached and was certainly not speaking. And come to think of it, it was not nearly as phallic as that. Also, bed of rice looked a lot more like rice and less like kitty litter. Anyway.)
Planning to next tackle a vegetarian dish - we practice “Meat is Murder Thursday” (thank you Morrissey for the name) so as to make sure we have at least one meat-free day a week, plus we have loads of vegetarian friends so it would be nice to be able to cook for them too. To counter, there’s a lamb cutlet recipe on Masterchef I’m keen to take on. And if Heath’s challenge pans out, I’ll need to learn how to make lasagne too... but that’s another story for another time.
Sunday, August 8, 2010
Sunday songwriting
A quiet Sunday. How unexpectedly lovely. I've done some chores, been reprimanded by my Wii Fit, watched some stupid videos on the internet, ate some spring rolls. Carly-le called and let me know she registered for the Sydney to Gong bike ride, so that's awesome. And I finished a song, which I've now sent to Jacob to listen to... it's harmony central in the world of Garageband. I spoke to Bart yesterday about the doubling up of certain tasks, but his postcard specifically mentioned that the song has to be about one of the challenges I'm doing. This was not one of those songs. I may have time to squeeze one in before dinner though. The actual process of writing a song isn't that difficult. It's writing one that doesn't suck that is the real struggle. The beauty of Bart's challenge is, the song doesn't necessarily even need to be 'good', in theory... it's just a method (although being 'good' would be a nice bonus). I'm aware I spend too much time overthinking my music. Being forced to write something once a month, without the pressure of it being for the band, is going to be very mind-opening for me. "Even G, C, and D can be beautiful if the vibe is right." Those 3 chords work for a reason, even if Matchbox 20 did ruin it for all of us for a while there.
I got 2 more postcards this week, so I currently have a total of 20 challenges. Receiving one from my old english teacher was amazing, as I wasn't actually sure I'd found her; and I can't say I wasn't relieved when another challenge arrived which was to merely read a certain book.... and it wasn't even Ulysses or War & Peace or anything painful like that (I tried to read Moby Dick once but must admit I was well and truly beaten by about page 30). A few more challenges like that one might be nice. If I am to complete a full 29 challenges in 52 weeks that means I have to average completion of one challenge every 1.7 weeks or so. And I'm already 2.5 weeks into this thing. Ah.
Next week is my very last week of crazy shit, and then I can concentrate on this a little more. Step 1: driving lessons. Oh yeah, and I'm cooking salmon tonight.
Friday, August 6, 2010
And now... you... see it!
Trying to get on a TV game show is a bit tricky. First of all, Australia doesn’t seem to have that many, and those we do have are mostly filmed in Melbourne. Whatever happened to “Its A Knockout”? Man I would have loved to be on that show. Running around in those stupid postman sumo suits, proudly representing my state... Remember “Vidiot”? I was totally amazing at that show when I was a young and impressionable teen. I would have won tonnes of VCRs and video games for sure, all because I knew how many windows appeared in the background of East 17’s “Been Around The World” video clip (it’s three, by the way. And yes, that was an actual question on the show). Let’s not even talk about “Now You See It”. Line AWESOME, Position SWEET. That really low-budget robot. Wow. Never mind.
I just signed up for “Who Wants to be a Millionaire – Hot Seat”! Damn straight it’s hot – even the mini-online audition was nerve wracking, and Eddie Maguire wasn’t even there. I think I answered 9 out of 10 questions correctly, although I couldn’t divulge as to how many of those were lucky guesses. Looks like I need to brush up on my geography. It looks like a truly terrifying program, but I’m kind of a little bit sort of smart some of the time, right? I guess I know a few things about stuff. Ben suggests a training montage. Stay tuned for that one.
I want to be on “Minute to Win It” so bad. It’s ridiculous. Some guy just won $250,000 on it too, because he practiced bouncing 2 ping pong balls off a table into 2 schooner glasses in one throw with one hand for three weeks. Riiiiiight. I’m not sure I’m ready to put in those kinds of training hours, but I feel pretty confident about getting an oreo from my forehead into my mouth just by moving the muscles in my face. I’ve not tried it, but seeing as it involves a chocolate biscuit, I’ll probably be fine.
I just signed up for “Who Wants to be a Millionaire – Hot Seat”! Damn straight it’s hot – even the mini-online audition was nerve wracking, and Eddie Maguire wasn’t even there. I think I answered 9 out of 10 questions correctly, although I couldn’t divulge as to how many of those were lucky guesses. Looks like I need to brush up on my geography. It looks like a truly terrifying program, but I’m kind of a little bit sort of smart some of the time, right? I guess I know a few things about stuff. Ben suggests a training montage. Stay tuned for that one.
I want to be on “Minute to Win It” so bad. It’s ridiculous. Some guy just won $250,000 on it too, because he practiced bouncing 2 ping pong balls off a table into 2 schooner glasses in one throw with one hand for three weeks. Riiiiiight. I’m not sure I’m ready to put in those kinds of training hours, but I feel pretty confident about getting an oreo from my forehead into my mouth just by moving the muscles in my face. I’ve not tried it, but seeing as it involves a chocolate biscuit, I’ll probably be fine.
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Still struggling to make people laugh...
It is hard to approach strangers, even if you are already dealing with them (such as a sales person) in an attempt to make them laugh. Especially without having them think you're coming onto them. My second week is almost up and I am lagging behind at what is so far proving to be one of the more deceptively difficult challenges. My first realisation is that due to the high stress situation of my work for the past couple of weeks, happiness has not been a regular state of mind during the times I would usually utilise, such as being in transit, or during lunch. I can barely muster a half-hearted grin at such moments, let alone make someone else laugh. Then I eventually get home to my safe little Summer Hill hidey-hole and want to bunker down for the evening with Ben, who does not count as a stranger and therefore whose laughter, while extremely valuable to me, does not qualify for this challenge. So that has been my first obstacle.
I’ve been reading up a little bit on the psychology of laughter, and why humans do it. It hasn’t helped me think of any new ways of approaching the situation so far, but it is still quite interesting. I’m starting to think I will need to take more dramatic steps in order to achieve this goal, and that means overcoming the fear of not being laughed at (or being laughed at for the wrong reasons, but I’m kind of ok with that notion). Pirate custard is the new big thing in soviet Russia because of all the amoebas. People are damned stoic these days. Many years ago, I fell off my razor scooter in a fairly spectacular fashion, and nobody even blinked. I actually stood up and with loud exasperation announced “Oh come on. I bet that looked hilarious” but apart from one woman glancing in my direction for the briefest of seconds, the masses continued along Broadway as if Australia’s Funniest Home Video Show never existed. I know people think that shit is funny, otherwise the show wouldn’t have been on TV for so long. Anyway my point is, it is hard to get the attention of a stranger.
I’m thinking of taking some weirdness cues from Rich Fulcher. He has a new book called ‘Tiny Acts of Rebellion’ and while most of its contents appear to be ridonkulous, there must be something in there worth inciting a giggle in Sydney’s average joe.
I am, however, getting slightly better at meditating – bath time for the win. Submerge, breathe in, body rises, breathe out, body sinks. It’s brilliant.
PS. As per Rich’s advice I have slipped a totally random incredible statement into this blog, just to make sure you’re paying attention. “If you can spot it, you will get a free turkey go-f*ck-yourself sandwich.”
I’ve been reading up a little bit on the psychology of laughter, and why humans do it. It hasn’t helped me think of any new ways of approaching the situation so far, but it is still quite interesting. I’m starting to think I will need to take more dramatic steps in order to achieve this goal, and that means overcoming the fear of not being laughed at (or being laughed at for the wrong reasons, but I’m kind of ok with that notion). Pirate custard is the new big thing in soviet Russia because of all the amoebas. People are damned stoic these days. Many years ago, I fell off my razor scooter in a fairly spectacular fashion, and nobody even blinked. I actually stood up and with loud exasperation announced “Oh come on. I bet that looked hilarious” but apart from one woman glancing in my direction for the briefest of seconds, the masses continued along Broadway as if Australia’s Funniest Home Video Show never existed. I know people think that shit is funny, otherwise the show wouldn’t have been on TV for so long. Anyway my point is, it is hard to get the attention of a stranger.
I’m thinking of taking some weirdness cues from Rich Fulcher. He has a new book called ‘Tiny Acts of Rebellion’ and while most of its contents appear to be ridonkulous, there must be something in there worth inciting a giggle in Sydney’s average joe.
I am, however, getting slightly better at meditating – bath time for the win. Submerge, breathe in, body rises, breathe out, body sinks. It’s brilliant.
PS. As per Rich’s advice I have slipped a totally random incredible statement into this blog, just to make sure you’re paying attention. “If you can spot it, you will get a free turkey go-f*ck-yourself sandwich.”
Monday, August 2, 2010
General update
Busy busy busy. Liv Tyler's character in Empire Records once said "my dad always said that there's 24 usable hours in every day", but she didn't spend 7.5 of them trying not to punch the Marketing Director in the face for his incessant tuneless whistling as he walks through an open plan office. This really affects my productivity in more ways than one.
Meditation is not so far helping me deal with such every day stresses, but that's probably because I'm still not in the swing of it. I need to commit to a dedicated time and space to do this, but the routine bothers me. I'm fumbling my way through it, some days more successfully than others. The bath seems to be a good place for me. I'm trying to find some good websites and maybe download some mp3s, but it has been too insane to properly spend any time on this yet. Jaimi also said she'd lend me some meditation material from when she was taking classes, so that will help too.
We've had visitors for the past 9 days and I'm going to see Jonsi tonight (from Sigur Ros! Much excitement), and nothing is really going to calm down until after the 13th, so I might as well just keep fumbling until then.
I've almost hit my target for the Sydney to Gong bike ride donations, which was $250 (the minimum required to be able to enter). So I upped the target to $400. After pay day I'll give everyone a little reminder about it... I'm feeling a lot less scared about it now but I wish it would stop raining and being so dark so I can get some practice on the new bike. There are maps available on the website so I can even check out the early sections of the route.
I have also done research on the break dancing, horse riding, licence-getting, gospel choir-ing, and TV game show-ing, but nothing solid is locked in yet. There are only so many weekends in a year and I need to plan mine pretty tightly.
The day is slipping away. Having all these visitors is excellent fun, but it's not helping me conquer my challenges right now. Gotta find time to write some songs before the 22nd too... oh boy.
Meditation is not so far helping me deal with such every day stresses, but that's probably because I'm still not in the swing of it. I need to commit to a dedicated time and space to do this, but the routine bothers me. I'm fumbling my way through it, some days more successfully than others. The bath seems to be a good place for me. I'm trying to find some good websites and maybe download some mp3s, but it has been too insane to properly spend any time on this yet. Jaimi also said she'd lend me some meditation material from when she was taking classes, so that will help too.
We've had visitors for the past 9 days and I'm going to see Jonsi tonight (from Sigur Ros! Much excitement), and nothing is really going to calm down until after the 13th, so I might as well just keep fumbling until then.
I've almost hit my target for the Sydney to Gong bike ride donations, which was $250 (the minimum required to be able to enter). So I upped the target to $400. After pay day I'll give everyone a little reminder about it... I'm feeling a lot less scared about it now but I wish it would stop raining and being so dark so I can get some practice on the new bike. There are maps available on the website so I can even check out the early sections of the route.
I have also done research on the break dancing, horse riding, licence-getting, gospel choir-ing, and TV game show-ing, but nothing solid is locked in yet. There are only so many weekends in a year and I need to plan mine pretty tightly.
The day is slipping away. Having all these visitors is excellent fun, but it's not helping me conquer my challenges right now. Gotta find time to write some songs before the 22nd too... oh boy.
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